We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Success! We fucked roommates!
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
