Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Randomize
