If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize