Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize
