Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize