I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
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