I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
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