My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize