susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Nobody cheats on THIS.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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