I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Randomize
