one two three fourrrrnication!
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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