Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
They are going to name an STD after you.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
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