what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize