was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
the liver wants what the liver wants
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
