Cold hands, warm shart.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Randomize
