no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize