This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize
