I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
she pinky promised me she was 18
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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