Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
