Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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