sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
