my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
