you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize