I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
