I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
