Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
