We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Randomize
