I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Actions speak louder than pants.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
