Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
