Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize