My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
