I'm really into asian looking animals
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
