Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
