even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
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