Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize