so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
