At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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