you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
