well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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