I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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