Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
