never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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