is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
We have so much sex to catch up on
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
Randomize
