dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize