I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
