I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize
