I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Randomize
