I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize
