found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
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