the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
