is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
